I don’t believe I will ever have a trusting relationship because I have bitterness over the last guy I dated. 5 years ago. I know I will snap at the next guy who that whines I am not giving him the attention he deserves (meaning pawing naked over him day at night due to his greatness). He expected my services any time of day which I resented.
Most men are not needy like that. But that didn’t stop my brain circuits from becoming hard-wired by repetition. The message was men are not worth the investment of my time. It ends badly.
Sure, it would be nice to have a partner to have dinner with, travel together, and grow old. But the echoes of my past are connected to very strong energy surrounding me making sure men don’t get within 2 feet of my personal space. Sure don’t want to go through that again.
I know these thoughts are irrational and limiting.
A little background, I have been on a self-healing journey for the last 5 decades. I took MANY classes, I read books, I meditated, I journaled, I made vision boards, I lead spirit groups in energy healing, and I filled boxes and boxes of notes all on personal development. I am even trained in Dale Carnegie’s “How to win friends and Influence People”.
I’d say I am pretty well-rounded – except for the romance area.
The biggest takeaway in all of my work is your THOUGHTS BECOME YOUR REALITY!
So, right here, right now I am going to REFRAME the old thought/belief that I don’t think I have it in me to be a good partner.
Wasn’t expecting that.
Me either. But before that, I’ll fill you in on a little background.
That relationship lasted years and fell apart abruptly was partly my fault. He wasn’t perfect.
But neither was I.
For one thing, my love language is “words of affirmation” (that is the last one of his) and his love language was “quality time” which was the lowest of mine. He wanted to spend time with me and I wanted to hear nice things about me from him. I wanted to do my thing and he rarely complimented me. So it was a cycle of misunderstanding.
Secondly, I was looking for a savior and he wanted intimacy.
I was not in tune with his needs and he was not in tune with mine.
No need to play the blame game.
No need for me to resist dating or falling in love because my last one was a bust.
We each have irrational thoughts. They can actually be categorized easily.
We exaggerate and minimize to fit our story. We focus on the negatives and ignore the positives. We jump to conclusions.
Time to stop!!!!!
Take responsibility for your thoughts. Remember – thoughts become reality.
From now on …
“I’m a good partner”
“I have a lot to offer a relationship”
No more repelling men. That simple. Take responsibility for your actions. Forgive others for being who they are and tell yourself a new story.
